Lost and Found

My first online date is with a lawyer. We agree to meet at the local Starbucks at 2 p.m. On the day of our meeting, after primping for an hour in front of the full-length mirror, I drive to Starbucks for our rendezvous.   

He isn’t there. I keep scanning the restaurant and looking at my watch.  Five more minutes pass. Then another five. Where the hell is this guy? I tense. Oh, my God, have I been stood up? What could be more humiliating than being stood up by a blind date?

I dig into my purse for my cell phone and call him. “Where are you?” I ask, trying to sound casual. He replies tersely he is at Starbucks. But that’s where I am, I tell him.

And then it hits me. I’m at the wrong Starbucks.

Does Anyone Have a Compass?

Breaking out into a sweat, I ask for the address of the Starbucks where he’s waiting. It’s around the corner, set back from the road. I race to my car. In my panic, I keep drive back and forth in front of the restaurant five times before I actually spot it.

I tear out of my car and rush in the door. I’m 25 minutes late. I see him sitting at the back of the restaurant, a dour expression on his face. I am practically panting. I stammer apologies and plunk down across from him, striving to seem poised and calm. But my heart is beating out of my chest.

Was It Something I Said?

After five minutes of perfunctory conversation, with me chattering non-stop and pasting a tight smile on my face, he abruptly stands up. He has to go. He needs to pick up something at the dry cleaners. Thanks for meeting, he mutters, and flies out the door. Leaving me sitting there, dejected and humiliated, feeling like a complete idiot.

I’m off to a great start in my quest for a soulmate! For my next meeting, maybe I’ll use a GPS or ask my date to leave a trail of breadcrumbs.